The Boston Recap's on the way, but I interrupt this for a special report:

I'm being set up at work. No lie. No joke. I'm the first one to say, "If it ain't dramatic, it ain't williambrucewest.com", but I'm seriously being set up to take a fall. As much as it pains me to admit this, I'm actually kind of scared....

Barring confidentiality agreements and the like, I'll try to explain as best I can.

A few weeks ago, I had to document a manager because she processed a SHADY AS SHIT return. There was all kinds of voodoo going on in that transaction, and it just looked fishy. Problem is, this chick and I ain't exactly best friends. You could cut the tension with a chainsaw.

So, I called my trainer and told her about the transaction, asking for advice. She told me to alert corporate's security dept. and tell them about the situation. I called, and was told to document the entire situation. Basically, write down everything that had transpired.

Prior to calling around, I'd questioned the manager so that I could better understand her side of the story. But her half-assed answers only led to more questions. In the end, she'd dug herself quite the hole.

So, once I documented the exchange, I faxed it to corporate, per their instructions. Beforehand, I told them, "I'm not comfortable with this because I'm not exactly unbiased. I don't like this person, but I don't want to get them in trouble. I just needed advice." But still, they told me to send it.

Now, as you've read in the past, my store has no manager. We have deptartment managers, but no supreme store manager to take care of conflicts like this. With no store manager, I had no one to hold on to the report in-store. So, it just kind of hid in a secret place. I knew where it was, but no one else knew it existed.

Well, while I was in Boston, all Hell broke loose. The bitch decided to "clean the office", and found what I'd written. I wasn't to show it to her or anything until I'd heard back from security. Three weeks gone by, and still no word. But apparently, she went off. And started trying to destroy my world.

First, my annual review magically disappeared. It was supposed to be sent in to HR last week, so my potential raise could be considered. But it went missing and HR called to say they'd never received it.

Next, my copy of my post-training assessment...disappeared. Nowhere to be found.

But the kicker, the document I wrote was gone. No clue where it is. Little does she know that security has a copy. Wouldn't be surprised if she's destroyed the office copy. But the bitch is still under investigation...

If only she had just left it at that...

Earlier this morning, while looking for a copy of the schedule, I looked in her mailbox. She IS responsible for scheduling, so it seemed likely there'd be a copy in there. But while looking, I saw a bunch of forms with my name at the top. Yup, the bitch had spent my vacation writing me up for shit I wasn't even responsible for. And, while I had told her what she'd done when I documented her, she had no intention of confronting me. She'd have just put them in my file and gone her merry way. Complete, childish, retaliation. All because her fucking feelings were hurt. Hey, bitch. Don't fuck around with company paperwork, and maybe you won't have anything to worry about.

So, apparently, she's writing me up for every little thing under the sun, just because she can. And I saw that she's been keeping notes on me. Little stupid shit like, "Will's outburst at staff meeting". She's just mad 'cause I made her look like a bitch to the staff. Surprise, douchebag! The staff already knew you were a bitch! This pisses me off, though, 'cause I haven't been written up since May 2004. Don't YOU think it's gonna look weird that I get written up TWICE, at the same time she discovers she's been reported? The bitch isn't even TRYING to hide this. Sheer retaliation!

So, she came in today, and tried her best not to say a thing to me. Meanwhile, our other hoodrat of a manager just thinks it's a joke. I swear, the whole thing reminds me of the Chris Rock skit. There are black people and.... But I don't have time to cowtow to the Big Nigga In Charge. I just don't. I'm too smart for this. I'm better than this...trash. So, why am I so nervous?

'Cause the store is a different animal. My allies are gone. I'm like Screech when he came back in "The New Class": Sure I know where all the lockers are, but I still have no one to eat lunch with. If this bitch is gonna be this childish, I can go there. I can totally go there. I just have to commit. Is this really how I want to go out? I may not have a choice, and forgive me for sounding "street", but I ain't gonna go out like no punk!

I was pissed the whole day. I kept having "What Would James Lamb Do?" moments. But I didn't have a Snapple Bottle, and I have a rule aginst cussing someone out before lunch. But what now? I mean, if you've been reading, you know I've been ready to "peace out" for some time. I just needed the catalyst. This must be said catalyst. Problem is, I've got nowhere else to go right now.

It's sad, too, 'cause I had kinda rededicated myself to H&M over the weekend. Boston was so great. Everything I wanted and more, and I thought to myself, "I can do this! It'll be a whole new challenge, but I can do this." And within 30 minutes of being at work, reality pissed on my spirit.

I could honestly never go back again. There's nothing for me there. In my locker is just a bunch of old Post Express issues. I've got no other ties anymore. But I can't do it logically. I need the money. But I'm serioudly just thinking of blowing off the rest of my sick days and then going into vacation days. That's what they're for, right? 'Cause I'm sick of that bitch!

I REALLY want to cuss her out. Just look her in the eye and say, "You're a dumb bitch". And you know what? I would, IF I knew what would happen. I'm quite the policy jockey and I'm trying to figure out if it would simply be insubordination, or could they fire me for that. I figure as long as I don't threaten, it's not termination-worthy. And since she's gonna write me up anyway...

You know how you always think of what you're gonna say AFTER the moment has passed? I've been brewing ALL day. Something akin to:

"Eunice, I know it must be hard for you in this world. This is a world for pretty people, and you just can't let your outer ugliness seep into who you really are. You see, I don't need this OR you. I have an Ivy League degree, while you have a bad weave, and some say, a penis. I mean, you're simply one dumb bitch. I've got no time for your little BNIC act. You're not a leader. You're not personable. It'd be different if you were even tolerable, but you're not. You're a bitch. In the truest essence of the word. You're a soulless bitch, and I hope you miss Hell 'cause you'll be returning very soon..."

What Would Batman Do? What Would Batman Do? What Would Batman Do?

Batman would rumble. So, tomorrow, we dance. I don't know what you're gonna read here tomorrow. Hell, maybe there'll just be a link to a newspaper article telling of my arrest. But tomorrow, we dance...

Posted by William @ 3/01/2005 11:12:00 PM
permalink | 8 comments

 

8 Comments:

• At 3/02/2005 11:42:03 AM, Karlos said…

  It may be too late already, but (if you're at all interested) my advice would be to think about what you want out of the situation, what might be gained, and what bridges might be burned by doing what you really want to do. When you apply for your next job, will they call any of the other managers at H&M for recommendations? Will those managers' opinions of you be changed if they hear about you going off on this bitch?
  
  Right now, this bitch trying to punk you feels important - it's in your face, big as life, you know you're better than her, she thinks she has the upper hand, and you can't stand to let it sit that way.
  
  In a week, a month, a year, though... this bitch won't even be a blip on your radar. You'll laugh and shake your head about that poor stupid "hoodrat with the bad weave" who's stuck at H&M if she's even lucky enough to keep that job. The only thing that'll matter about the situation is how you handled it.
  
  If you can really get even, there's some satisfaction there, but if all you do is cuss her out, you'll end up feeling foolish, and it won't affect her at all. After all, look at this woman; do you think this would be the first time someone had called her an ugly bitch?
  
  I'm not saying "rise above because it's the right thing to do"... screw that, the world sucks; get yours. I'm saying, unless you have a direct way to get even, just do what you can to see she gets hers from security, then stand your ground calmly like the better man you are. That way, you don't have to cringe later, thinking of how stupid you made yourself look, and how you let her get under your skin.
  
  Then, when you decide it's time to leave H&M, you can do it calmly, professionally - on your own terms. I envy the J Lamb attitude sometimes, but I've never heard J say, "I'm glad I broke that bottle of peach Snapple on the wall."
  
  Just my 2 cents on it - take it or leave it. Hope everything works out well, though.
  
  -Karlos

   

• At 3/02/2005 11:42:36 AM, Karlos said…

  It may be too late already, but (if you're at all interested) my advice would be to think about what you want out of the situation, what might be gained, and what bridges might be burned by doing what you really want to do. When you apply for your next job, will they call any of the other managers at H&M for recommendations? Will those managers' opinions of you be changed if they hear about you going off on this bitch?
  
  Right now, this bitch trying to punk you feels important - it's in your face, big as life, you know you're better than her, she thinks she has the upper hand, and you can't stand to let it sit that way.
  
  In a week, a month, a year, though... this bitch won't even be a blip on your radar. You'll laugh and shake your head about that poor stupid "hoodrat with the bad weave" who's stuck at H&M if she's even lucky enough to keep that job. The only thing that'll matter about the situation is how you handled it.
  
  If you can really get even, there's some satisfaction there, but if all you do is cuss her out, you'll end up feeling foolish, and it won't affect her at all. After all, look at this woman; do you think this would be the first time someone had called her an ugly bitch?
  
  I'm not saying "rise above because it's the right thing to do"... screw that, the world sucks; get yours. I'm saying, unless you have a direct way to get even, just do what you can to see she gets hers from security, then stand your ground calmly like the better man you are. That way, you don't have to cringe later, thinking of how stupid you made yourself look, and how you let her get under your skin.
  
  Then, when you decide it's time to leave H&M, you can do it calmly, professionally - on your own terms. I envy the J Lamb attitude sometimes, but I've never heard J say, "I'm glad I broke that bottle of peach Snapple on the wall."
  
  Just my 2 cents on it - take it or leave it. Hope everything works out well, though.
  
  -Karlos

   

• At 3/02/2005 11:43:41 AM, Karlos said…

  sorry for the double-post; button took me to an "error" page the first time.

   

• At 3/02/2005 11:07:48 PM, James said…

  "I'm glad I broke that bottle of peach Snapple on the wall." - James
  
  There. I said it.
  
  At least it puts everything in perspective when people deal with me. Y'know, it's always calming to realize that your friends have next to zero respect for you. It always soothes me to remember that for my friends I am no more than an irrationally angry Black man prone to violent reactions to every slight, real or imagined, a low-budget 50 Cent without the nine bullet holes and the multi-million dollar Interscope record contract. Thanks, guys.
  
  As for your situation, Will, I'll answer it. What Would James Lamb Do? The same thing I've always done in work situations where I'm getting screwed - formulated a sound, reasoned, detailed argument to articulate my position and explain that to relevant authorities.
  
  At the end of the day I was fired. Twice. But I also kept my self-respect. The only way to stand up for yourself is to use your mind to defend yourself. That's not anger, it's common sense. That's the J Lamb position. You don't have to be a crazy nigger like me to realize that.

   

• At 3/03/2005 01:53:36 AM, William said…

  James, James, James,
  I was not using you as the quote, "Crazy Nigger". I was using you because you're my "bold friend", who doesn't take shit from anybody. Be it violent or a rational sitdown, you always get your point across and get most people to fuck off.
  
  So, don't be offended. After all, I used you and Batman as my "What Would They Do?" scenarios. You know how I feel about Batman, so I don't see how you're entirely insulted to be amongst such distinguished company. Now, if I had asked, "What would Luke Cage Do?", then I'd give you permission to beat my ass...

   

• At 3/03/2005 12:13:56 PM, Karlos said…

  "Y'know, it's always calming to realize that your friends have next to zero respect for you."
  
  If you mean me, J, then I think you're mis-reading me. The point was (much like Will's description of you as his "bold friend"), I envy the way you stand up and don't take unnecessary shit. You're a passionate and eloquent orator and you know how to use your own charisma, as well as the biases of others, to leave an impression (or, in some cases, make a frat boy shit his pants). However, the few times I've seen an outburst of emotion from you that seemed to come without any particular plan or goal (eg. the Snapple bottle), you didn't seem to accomplish anything (except covering poor Adam Crouch in peach Snapple), and the incidents only gave you a bunch of drama to deal with.
  
  I'm curious why you'd say you're glad you threw the Snapple bottle. Do you wish you had done something like that in your work situations, too, instead of dealing with the relevant authorities as you described?
  
  Point is, peach Snapple and the door of the WSH art gallery aren't what I mean by "the J Lamb attitude." What I'm talking about is J Lamb standing in front of Risley after the judicial board hearing in his the-difference-between-you-and-me-is-that-I-make-this-look-good suit, saying, "Karlos, they all came after me, and I fucked 'em all!"

   

• At 3/17/2005 06:35:54 PM, Tamika said…

  Mann...all this juicy stuff happens when i leave H&M...handle you business Will :-)...but if u ever need me to join you for you lunch jus give me a call :-)!

   

• At 3/17/2005 06:35:55 PM, Tamika said…

  Mann...all this juicy stuff happens when i leave H&M...handle you business Will :-)...but if u ever need me to join you for you lunch jus give me a call :-)!

   

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